NRL POWER RANKINGS AFTER WEEK 7

It’s time to start believing Eels and Tigers fans. Your teams are real!

The bad teams are starting to be more consistently bad but the top teams will be juggling around for a while still.

Here are this weeks power rankings:

16. Cronulla (No change)- They put a full Gallen in the tank but it wasn’t enough. There’s life in this team, but they are definitely giving everyone a head start.

15. North Queensland (No change)- Is anyone else sick of their whinging whenever they lose? You didn’t hear them complaining in last year’s semi final against the Sharks when the clock stopped giving them another chance at victory. Stop crying over spilt milk. You lost. Get on with it.

14. Newcastle (Down 1)- Moats, bows and arrows and knights couldn’t stop the invasion of the Broncos this week. This was a brutal loss. This was Games of Thrones brutal.

13. New Zealand- NRL life hasn’t started so well for the new coach. No need for chalk in the win column just yet. Perennial slow starters, they are going to need to come home faster than Kingston Town in his famous Cox Plate victory. “And the Warriors can’t win…”

12. Canberra (Up 2)- The ref may have had a shocker but the Raiders had a Croker. Try savers galore. This was a must win game and they came through and the Storm are green with envy.

11. Souths (Down 1)- Well… They just couldn’t pull a bunny out of the hat and win this week.

10. Melbourne (Down 1) – On the line. Short of the line. Bellamy will be lining up to pay the NRL $10k if he keeps carrying on and will definitely have a Bellyache.

9. Roosters (Up 2)- They stopped the Shaun Kenny-Dowall. The skid is over. They definitely aren’t the same team as last year, but premierships aren’t won in Easter.

8. St George (No change)- The Dragons are barely breathing fire and had a number of errors. But at the end of the day if you score more points than your opponents you should win.

7. Penrith (No change)- King Jamal returned to haunt his former team. The man who was once a wrecking ball is starting to find the same form that put him in a sky blue. A great win by the Panthers and this is one which may mean a lot come September.

6. Parramatta (Down 1)- The multicultural Eels, as they are now being called, lost a thriller. Did Brooks dive like Matthew Mitchum or was it a legitimate Greg Louganis dive? I can hear the blue and gold army assembling.

5. West Tigers (Up 1) – Lions and tigers have merged to form Ligers and right now this West’s and Balmain merger is looking just as threatening! 50,000 people came to watch this beast in its natural environment and they weren’t let down with what they saw.

4. Gold Coast (Down 3)- They have a new mascot; the squirrel. Who cares if Bird did this or not. It’s been going on for years. They’re football players. They’re grubs. And that’s why we love em!

3. Brisbane (No change)- The Broncos all had haircuts from the Barba and played with a fresh hair about them.

2. Manly (Up 2)- Understrength. Starved of ball like someone doing Passover. And they still won. This team is… Well this is just the Manly way. They are incredible.

1. Canterbury (Up 1)- The number of patients suffering heart attack symptoms have increased by 300 percent over the last 3 weeks. 3 games. 3 wins. A total winning margin of 3 points. I’m not sure if it’s fun or not being a Dogs fan at the moment.

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